Motivation is lying to you.

I once sat on the edge of my bed at 6 am, gym bag packed, trainers laced. I’d promised myself that today I’ll start again. I waited for the spark, that rush of motivation I’d seen on YouTube, the one that makes people sprint into a new life. But it didn’t come.

I told myself, “Maybe after coffee.” After coffee, “Maybe after work.” By evening, I was on the sofa with crisps, scrolling through other people’s before-and-after photos, hating myself. Motivation hadn’t just abandoned me. It mocked me.

For years, I thought that was the problem, that I was lazy, weak, missing whatever gene makes people consistent. But here’s the truth I learned the hard way: motivation is unreliable. It’s a sugar high, gone the second life gets messy.

What actually carried me through losing 50kg wasn’t motivation at all. It was systems. Boring, unglamorous, unshiny systems: showing up twice a day, even when I was tired, grumpy, or convinced it wasn’t working. Especially then.

That’s when everything shifted: motivation makes change fragile. Systems make it inevitable.

Your turn:

Stop waiting for the spark. It’s not coming.

This week, pick one habit so embarrassingly small you can’t excuse your way out of it. One glass of water before coffee. One push-up before bed. One line in a notebook. Do it whether you feel like it or not.

Because the real test isn’t how you act on good days. It’s whether you show up on the ugly ones, tired, annoyed, hungry, distracted. That’s where identity is built.

And since I don’t want to just leave you with theory, here are 3 of my favourite Finds this week, tools, ideas, and small practices that actually make showing up easier when motivation fails. Think of them as backup fuel for the days when willpower is nowhere to be found.

Let’s dive in.

Each week, I’ll share 3 things that have genuinely helped me, small shifts across the three pillars of ConfigurSelf: mindset, habits, and health. The kind of things that have made a real difference in my own life, and that I’d happily recommend to a close friend.

For years, I thought my “lack of motivation” was the problem. But half the time, it wasn’t mindset, it was biology. Nights of broken sleep, evenings wired but exhausted, mornings where I felt heavy before the day even began.

That’s when I started using magnesium glycinate. It’s not a magic pill. What it gives me is steadiness: deeper sleep, calmer evenings, and fewer of those restless nights that used to derail my mornings. Suddenly, showing up didn’t feel like a battle with my own body.

The science is clear: magnesium supports your nervous system, regulates energy, and helps muscles recover. In plain English, it removes the friction. Because consistency isn’t just mental grit; it’s making sure your body is resourced enough to follow through.

The win isn’t the supplement itself. The win is removing one more excuse to quit.

Get Magnesiu glysinate here →

I’ve tried every trick to keep myself consistent: shiny journals, colourful apps, even posting online for “accountability.” But when the novelty wore off, so did I. Motivation disappeared, and I slipped back into the same loop: start strong, fade, restart, repeat.

Beeminder broke that loop because it hurts when you don’t follow through. You set a goal, track your progress, and if you fall behind, it charges your card. Suddenly, skipping isn’t just “I’ll try again tomorrow.” It’s a bill. And that changes everything.

There’s psychology behind it: research shows we’re more motivated by avoiding loss than by chasing rewards. Beeminder turns that quirk of human behaviour into leverage. It’s not about hype or willpower. It’s about building stakes so you keep moving, even on days you’d rather quit.

The win isn’t the app itself. The win is knowing you can’t afford to start over again.

For years, my self-talk started with “I want.” I want to lose weight. I want to be fit. I want to eat better. But “I want” is fragile. It depends on how you feel that day. And on the days I felt tired, overwhelmed, or low, “I want” disappeared.

What shifted everything was replacing “I want” with “I am.” “I am someone who moves daily.” “I am someone who fuels instead of numbs.” “I am someone who keeps promises to herself.”

It felt strange at first, almost like lying. But the more I acted from “I am,” the faster it became true. Science backs it: when identity shifts, behaviour follows. Motivation is optional. Identity doesn’t ask permission.

The win isn’t the list of goals. The win is deciding who you are, and proving it one small act at a time.

Most of my podcasts start as background noise, dishes, emails, and dinner. But every now and then, something catches me mid-scroll and actually makes me stop. This week, it was this.

If something in this email made you pause, think, or feel seen, send it to a friend who’s been quietly trying to make a change, too.
You never know what might land at the right moment. Link here.

And if you’d like early access to the eBook I’m writing, the real systems, mindset shifts, and habits that helped me lose 50kg and rebuild my health, you can join the waiting list here. “You’re not behind. You’re building, and that takes time.”